Love is in the air

So it's Valentine's Day, the day on which you declare your undying desires to the one you love and you might even send your wife a card also.
Lumpkin has bought his little sort, sorry, fiance, a pearl necklace, well, that's what he said she's getting this evening and I'm sure she'll be overcome with emotion or something similar.
He also got her a card from some website called 'Wanky-Partridge.com' or something. He designed it himself and he showed it to me and it's very nice, all hearts and roses with a picture of them together in the middle. He said she was worth the £2.99 it cost and said that my idea of sending her a Post-It note was 'not in the spirit of St. Valentines Day'.

Col is booked to play a set in The Bull tonight and they are expecting quite a crowd. He's going to do some special Valentine's night renditions such as 'Bat out of Hell', 'My Ding-A-Ling' and 'Annie, I'm not your daddy'. The menu also has a 'lover's theme' tonight with such delicacies as Toad in the Hole, Fudge Brownies and Fish Pie.
I'm taking sandwiches...
Hopefully they won't put on any of that 'Love Potion' ale that they brewed last year. It really was some foul old shyte - tasted almost as bad as Adnams. Mind you it was fairly strong and Hilly had a couple of pints and went home to have some 'Fantastic sex' as he put it. Apparently his wife went up to bed dressed in some sexy underwear after Hilly got in and went into the bedroom where she found Hilly with a stash of artistic grot pamphlets spread over the bed. She asked him if they were to heighten his sexual pleasure to which he replied "Yes, once you piss off into the spare room"
They were talking again by Easter.

It will be interesting to see if Pilly comes over for a pint. He was meant to be taking his good lady out for a meal at a very posh restaurant in town but he left it too late to book and couldn't get in so he went back home and said that he wanted them to rekindle the romance of when they first met so his missus asked if they were going away to the hotel where they stayed on their honeymoon and Pilly said no, he wanted to take her for a bag of chips and a grope behind the Spa shop.
If his back isn't too stiff from sleeping on the sofa, he might come down The Bull for a pint.

Ahh, love, ain't it marvellous ?